It started with me waiting for classes to start at Career Launcher as they took some 20 - 22 days to start. These days looked like an eternity and with each passing day my anxiety of starting the studies grew larger and larger. When I got the MBA syllabus, my first reaction was " do I need to complete just these books for getting those coveted calls from the premier institutes of India". But then, I came to terms with this "small syllabus" after a few months when I started realizing that the unfinished part of the syllabus still remains the same. I started studying hard, waiting for the day to come when I could finally complete my syllabus but eventually that day never came.
Then began the Test Series and also began my wait of getting higher percentiles. It never happened and slowly & steadily the number of institutes in my list of " ELITE MBA COLLEGES" started increasing. In the meanwhile I had mastered the art of speed waiting. I could wait an hour in only five minutes.
August 2008 - The time of filling up CAT form. By this time I had become very passionate about doing an MBA. For me CAT meant only and only HUGE EXPECTATIONS. Even though I was not getting very good percentiles in mock tests, even though I had not completed even 60% of my syllabus, even though I knew I would not be able to perform exceptionally well in the exam, but, deep down in my heart I had this feeling that I will do wonders on 16th November 2008 (CAT DAY). I wanted that day to come as quickly as possible. Some times though, I do wonder, had I not been that eager to take up the exam fight, it could have been a different story.
The wait was killing me. It ruined my 15 hard earned leaves from office which I took for my studies. I could hardly study those last 15 days. The penultimate night before the exam I could not even close my eyes properly. Finally came the most awaited day of my entire life and guess what the moment I came out of the exam hall, I knew that I have done wonders but "The Other Way Round". I had lost my thinking capability and the only thing I could think of then was to go home and check the answers of coaching institutes. After pressing F5 (refresh) for some 1000 times I finally got a chance to match my answers and to make my worst fears come true. I had killed my expectations then and there. Somebody has correctly said " Unhappiness is best defined as the difference between our talents and our expectations ".
After taking all my entrance exams, the only two colleges from where I have got the calls are GIM and FORE. And now, when in our company, it has been declared that there is no job guarantee, I guess, God can't play any more cruel games with me.
THE WAIT STILL CONTINUES.
